Have you ever sat face to face with a divinely appointed, God directed conviction? It’s a love hate relationship to feel the Lord’s pruning. Though sometimes painful, you know your being formed into His image and reminded of His truths.
Allow me to give you some back story. I am passionate and driven girl. I love to write beautiful words, it comes so easily. I love using the creative side of my brain where my heart overflows. In fact, I get kind of cranky when I can’t get out the creative things on my heart.
It’s all good Jesus stuff I want to do…really.
I want to share Him with the world. Share Him with mothers on the brink of exhaustion, with wives about to throw in the towel. To share all the glorious words pressed on my heart by Jesus that inhabits it all. I long to speak to the crowds, encourage in the small group, write books, articles, and blog post about the urgency of a life surrendered to Christ.
So I set to work…
I research, learn tactics, of how to get my voice heard. I leave the television on a little longer for the little ones. I stay up into the wee hours of the night and wake up hours before them walking through the day halfhearted doing my motherhood thing. I continue in this cycle in order to reach women around the world. I long to push, encourage, and inspire. In the end, I am empty. My children don’t have me.
The conviction felt immense. Here I am stepping over my first mission field in order to reach another.
We as women and mothers can never forget that though all of our outside endeavors may be faith-filled, well-intentioned, and Christ centered; the first order of business is to the man beside and the ones underfoot.
There will always lie the debate of the working mothers versus the work from home mothers. No matter which side of the tracks you fall on, the people around us are the first mission field. They are the first job, first conference, first book, first promotion, and first investment. These babies have seen my face, but sadly not my heart this week.
So here I go, as I do every couple of weeks, changing my lens of life. Pursuing some continuing ed in my family. I plan a date night, I read a book about reconnecting with my daughters, I wrestle with my boys, I go on a walk, I give my heart first to them because Jesus gave me theirs.
I want to encourage you to pursue your God given passions, talents and strengths. I, for one, am still going to write and speak of His name, and take the God given opportunities as they come my way. This is the way God designed us!
The needs of our eternal gifts must be met first with all we have to give, not the leftovers.
Have you been there?
Who’s with me and is ready to take a continuing education course on their family?
