Our two oldest children were involved in a children’s choir performance on a Sunday afternoon recently at a nursing home. Carrianna, our three year old daughter was sitting quietly by herself observing the service and my husband took our youngest daughter so I could attempt to sit comfortably (if there is such a thing during the last month of pregnancy!)
Then suddenly it hit me. I caught a fleeting sense of what it will feel like when the days of my children sitting on my lap will have passed.
My lap is almost always filled with a child during church services and it felt strange in that moment to not have one of them clinging to me. I told my husband that Carrianna could sit next to me but he said she was fine,so I sat back in my chair to enjoy the service while attempting to brushoff the sad thought that had caught me unawares.
Later that evening, we went to another service for a special Christmas musical performance. This time it was extremely crowded, so Carrianna sat on my lap. She clung to me, sweetly looking up at me and smiling,commenting on the service and saying something about baby Jesus.
I smoothed her hair, kissed her forehead, and whispered to her that I loved her. She gazed up at me with her big brown eyes and told me that she loved me as well.
And I knew she meant it.
Could such an exchange take place too many times in a mother’s life? If you cannot answer “yes” now, you’ll surely have no difficulty answering so when they’re gone.
There will come a time when my lap is empty. I don’t want to waste my moments on frivolous indulgences, empty promises, and the escape-hatch answer of “we’ll do it tomorrow.”
My children want a mother. And I intend that they shall have one –
open lap and all.