Why Every Moment Matters When You’re a Mom (Don’t Let Them Slip Away)

by StephanieLangford on August 12, 2011 in Legacy, Purpose

So many days, I get overwhelmed by the mundane trivialities of life. Another meal to serve, another page of math to check, another load of laundry to wash, another diaper to change, another fight to break up. Particularly for those of us with young children, days can run into each other and tasks can feel endless.

Am I making a difference?” we may wonder. “Does any of this really matter in the lives of my children?

Some days I struggle to believe that it does matter. I lose vision and lose heart and I want to give up in this great pursuit called motherhood.

This summer, God used a sad and very tangible experience to infuse fresh hope and energy and vision into my soul, and to encourage me to keep pushing forward as a mother.

It was four weeks ago, on a warm summer’s evening, that I said good-bye to her.

Her husband had called that morning, saying this day might be the last. I found a sitter for my children and tearfully ventured to my dear friend Katy’s home to say the words I had dreaded saying. I prayed hard for strength to walk into that familiar home and see the faces she would leave behind and somehow trust that my God was mighty in the midst of even this situation, and that He alone could work it out for His glory and yes, even for good.

You see, Katy was not only my friend, but she was a wife and a mom. A wife to Peter, of over a decade. Devoted, steadfast, faithful, loving.

And a mama to 3 beautiful children, aged 5, 3 and 1. Playmates of my children, and nearly the same ages. They were well loved, carefully nurtured and exceptionally cherished by their mom.

Katy didn’t spend her “mundane” days of laundry, cooking, cleaning and child rearing knowing just how short her time would be with these little ones entrusted to her. 

Throughout her 8 month battle with cancer, she fought hard, as only a mother who wants to see her children grow up can fight. She wanted more time. More days to love them. More months to train and shape who they would become. More years to faithfully pray for them and watch them come to know and trust and serve the Lord.

For reasons I may never know, the Lord didn’t give her those extra years or even days. He gave her 5 1/2 short years to mother her children, and to pour into them all that she could.

Not one of us knows how many more years or months or days are written in the book of our lives, or of our children’s lives. And that makes every moment precious because we have it NOW.

Each day is an opportunity to love them. To teach. To train. To set an example of following Jesus wholeheartedly. To share the Gospel. To pray with and for them. To kiss them. To enjoy them. A day to cherish and to use to the fullest.

I’m begging the Lord to help me not to waste a single moment. Will you do the same?

Image by The Welsh Poppy

StephanieLangford

Stephanie Langford is a mama and homeschooler to her three favorite little people (soon to be four!), and together with her husband runs a music school in Surrey, BC. She blogs at Keeper of the Home, on the topics of nutrition, natural homemaking, “greener” lifestyle choices, and frugal, simple living… but from a distinctively Christian worldview, doing her best to infuse these popular topics with the grace, good news and hope of Christ. Her two books are geared to helping families live more naturally and eat real, whole foods, without being overwhelmed and without going broke.

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{ 36 comments }

Lisa H. August 12, 2011

Thank you for reminding us that each moment and day we have is from God and that we are to use them wisely. I agree with you. I want to do a better job of not wasting those moments with my child and husband. Also, I feel we need to be aware of those moments God gives us to share Christ and His salvation message with others. As you said, we never know when God will choose to take us home to Him.

Jennie August 12, 2011

This was very touching and so very true! Thank you for reminding us how short time really is.
Jennie

Tiana @ God Made, Home Grown August 12, 2011

Stephanie, I am so sorry for the loss of your dear friend. I will pray for her husband and children. This is such an important reminder. We truly do not know how much time we will have with our families.

September anne August 12, 2011

Stephanie…
Heart words for every mom today. Carrying them with me today, and every day.
Thank you.

Stacy August 12, 2011

Such a powerful post Stephanie. You’ve really put my day in perspective.

We don’t know how much time we have or how much time our children have. We must make the most of each day!

Thank you. I hope lots of people read this!

Karen Long August 12, 2011

wow…what a powerful post.. I am new to your blog via my friend Chanin and her daughter.. and I am very touched.. I am now a follower, and too a firm beleiver that God grants us the privilege to be moms and wives.. and we are the Heart of the Home and our familys .. sometimes it is a trying job,but very very important and even more precious.. Thanks for a wonderful post.. I will become a follower as well..
Gods Blessing on you and your family as well as Katys family..

Amy August 12, 2011

Thanks for sharing this. This touched my heart.

Marla August 12, 2011

Oh how very sad. Thank you for sharing this story. It makes me take a step back . Blessings

Kris August 12, 2011

Oh God bless you for this. What a tribute. I am sorry for the loss of your sweet friend… Praying that Jesus comforts and gives hope, and thank you friend, for reminding me, on this dificult day that I have had, to treasure it all….

Tiffany August 12, 2011

Great piece! Praying that God will help me to remember this hourly. Thanks so much for sharing.

Cathy J Wells August 12, 2011

This really touched my heart because I lost my only son in a car accident three years ago and four months later, his son was born. We don’t know what God has in store for us, we just have to trust Him because He is the only one who knows what the true plan is. It’s not for us to understand and believe me I’ve wondered many times why he took my son back at age 27, however I have NEVER questioned His decision because in my own heart I know why. I don’t have to worry anymore about where my son is and what he’s doing because I know he’s in God’s care now. As hard as that is to accept, it gives me peace. God’s love is the ONLY thing that has gotten me through this devastating loss. I miss my son everyday, but going through this loss has strengthened my faith and made me walk closer with my Savior and for that I am thankful.

Kristen Yost August 13, 2011

I’m so sorry for the loss of you friend. I thank you for sharing this story. It really makes me realize that we really don’t know how long the Lord is going to give each of us on this earth. We really do need to take a step back and cherish every moment we have with our families. Even while doing the mundane daily tasks that we as mothers have each day. Thank you!

Erin@TheHumbledHomemaker August 13, 2011

Thank you so much for this heart-wrenching reminder! I am so sorry for your loss. This reminds me of the story of Rachel Barkey, a Canadian wife and mom who went to be with the Lord at age 37 two years ago. I was living not far from her in Vancouver at the time, and I watched her testimony online just days before her death in July 2009. It’s WELL WORTH watching (long, but worth it): http://deathisnotdying.com/ Other mothers reading this: Please, watch it!

One of my best childhood friends was killed instantly in a car wreck when she was 17 & I was 19. It will be 12 years a few weeks before Christmas. It was devastating to her family and all of us friends who had grown up with her and were just coming into our adulthood. I named my oldest daughter after her, and every few months, I still dream about her. In fact, I dreamed about her last night. Then I woke up–and had your post in my inbox.

There have been days and times within the day with two small children that I feel weary and tired and lament of the “constant” fussy and whiny, etc. that comes with young children. God uses posts like this, stories like Rachel’s and even my friend’s early death to put me in my place. A few months ago, as I was giving my child a bath, it was as if the Lord whispered to me: “You GET to be a wife and mother. This is a treasured time. Savor it. Your friend never got that chance. And yet…she is in the better place. She is glorified. But treasure your time here.”

Oh, how it brings me tears now.

Thank you again. I needed to read this!

Becky August 13, 2011

Thank you. I’m a mom of three kids aged 4, 2, and 5 months, so this really hit home with me. All I can say is thank you. Thanks for the reminder that every moment I have with them matters. Thanks for the reminder to keep perspective. I’ll be praying for Katy’s family.

Kim August 13, 2011

What a powerful story! Thank you for sharing the testimony of your dear friend.

Sam August 13, 2011

I had shivers with this post. Thank you for sharing your heart, this was a beautiful post.

Janice August 13, 2011

Wow, this post is heart wrenching. I cried and felt convicted. Thank you. Powerful post as pp said. I love it.

Mary August 13, 2011

4 years ago I also had to say goodbye to a friend who lost her battle to cancer, leaving behind 3 young children. It does change how you see life. Thank you for the reminder.

DB Landes August 13, 2011

So very powerful.

Robyn August 14, 2011

Thank you. So very true, and such an important message for moms to remember. My heart goes out to her children and her husband.

Hannah August 15, 2011

I’m so sorry for the wrenching loss of your friend. Heartbreaking. You honor her memory by taking this lesson to heart, though. For me, this same lesson came from almost losing one of my children in a drowning accident last summer. My perspective on the value of each mundane day with our children can never be the same.

Nola August 15, 2011

I’m so sorry for the loss of your friend. I can’t imagine what that is like. But its also encouraging how a loss like this can bring about words of encouragement for others. Thank you for sharing this. I have often been thinking about how I am not spending enough quality time with my kids. I long to do better and then fail and fail again. Children do not fit in well with to do lists and so I struggle. I am trying to change the attitude that I have and this a wonderful enouragement.

Karen Yousef August 16 August 16, 2011

Thanks so much for the story. I really appreciate it. My child is my life and everyday I try tomake the best day for him and let him know God loves him and that there is nothing like a mothers love.

Jane Anne August 19, 2011

What honor you have just given your friend! Her legacy lives on. She has touched many lives through this post. Your powerful words encourage me toward the longings of my heart and away from the pullings of the mundane. Thank you.

Suzanne August 20, 2011

Thank you for sharing about your sweet friend, Katy. I, too, will pray for her husband and children and family & friends. What a sore trial that must be. I needed to read this post. I really did. Every day I want to whine and complain about all the tasks I repeat over and over every day. But, wow, what a great gift my children and other family are to me. Do I value them as such? Sometimes yes, too often, no. This life is so short.

JulieK August 21, 2011

wow – so true. I struggle with this too – somedays I can barely tear myself away from my family to DO the laundry b/c I just keep wanting to spend those minutes hugging my son! 🙂

Rebekah August 22, 2011

Beautiful. What a reunion you will have in Heaven!
We should certainly be more aware of how fleeting our lives are. Never should our lips complain about the children we’re blessed with (or not) and the jobs which come with it.
Thank you for sharing this. I’m enjoying your blog after finding it recently. Thank you.

Sue August 22, 2011

thank you for this post and your beautiful words and testimony. Puts our lives and jobs as moms in perspective. God bless you, Katy, and her family.

Brooke August 23, 2011

Wow – I’m so sorry for your loss. We lost a dear friend last week and that has been tough. But a young mom is so … wow – just makes you want to squeeze those little ones.

I have to say that this is the very first time I heard of your blog – it was on an email from/with Weekend Wanderings. But having 3 daughters myself (also hit home with your post b/c my daughters are 5,3 and 1) and wanting someday for them to desire to be homemakers… but wondering how I steer them in the directions. Lots of prayer and teaching and loving – and showing them the joy (when I have it) in my work! BTW – have you read “On the Other Side of the Garden” – it’s a WONDERFUL tool, very straight from the bible and right up your alley it sounds like. Thank you for sharing this story and I look forward to reading your blog.

Nkiruka March 17, 2012

thou im a prospecting mother, dis message ll b very helpful. We pray God spare our lives. Amen. Thank u so much.

yemisi March 22, 2012

I am blessed by the message• God bless you•

Miranda March 30, 2012

All I can say is, amen.

Donna Moring April 5, 2012

My sister recently lost her adopted niece with cancer, she left 2 small children, what was so sad she had a drug probl

Judith April 6, 2012

My mother had only 6 years for us and 35 years after, I miss her so much.
I try to input so much into my children but I know at the end, its the love that counts.
Thank you Stephanie.

Tayo April 9, 2012

Am highly blessed by ur post even though am a prospective mother. Am just pleading for God to prepare me for motherhood. It is a great task keeping the home- a christian home, but I know His grace will be sufficient for me.

minnie t. labasano May 2, 2012

at the start, i said to myself,”i’m not done yet, i’m doing them all over again with my grand children”. at the end, i said, “thank You, Lord, for the long life, strength, joy, love and endurance You are giving me and my husbband. blessed be God forever!”

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