*This giveaway is now closed*
My mom had a sinus infection and I had finally convinced her to go to bed and leave the housework to me, my dad was at work, and my five youngest siblings -all six and under -seemed to be bent on trying my patience. I had a list of things I wanted to do as long as my arm -I had two tests to study for, lesson plans to write up, papers to grade, a novel to edit. I promised myself I’d get some work done once they settled down for nap, but, by the time they did, my mind felt like it was made of mush.
And I was almost guilty for being tired.
I mean, I’m living the life I’ve chosen: I love my little brothers and sister -their smiles brighten up my day. I love the responsibility of cooking, cleaning, and laundry -no, I’m not Snow White, but I like the feeling of a well-ordered home. I love being an English tutor, and I love getting my English B.A. via distance learning.
I love being a home-girl.
But because the way I’ve ordered my life is counter-intuitive to most Americans, those days when I’m tired, overwhelmed, or even a tad bit frustrated seem almost to condemn me.
Why is that so?
Why, if I was pulling a full course load at Columbia while simultaneously interning for a renowned publishing house would it be all right for me to come home at night bushed and proud of it… but when my brothers test my patience, it’s seen as proof that I should have been doing something else with my life?
Why, if I were a renowned fiction-writer headed to a book signing while squawking to my publicist on my cellphone and trying to hear my latest interview on the radio would I feel a bit hectic… but when I’m a little frazzled with the multi-tasking with household chores do I feel the need to hide it under a fake smile?
Why do we feel that it’s okay to be tired only if we’re dressed in a power suit?
I don’t anymore, actually. When I get tired, when I get discouraged, when I get overwhelmed… I admit it. I try not to wallow in a pity puddle, but I also try not to be a Stepford Wife in training. I go to the foot of the cross and I heave a sigh of relief:
And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. ~Galatians 6:9
As for you, brothers, do not grow weary in doing good. ~2 Thessalonians 3:13
Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain. ~1 Corinthians 15:58
When we’re following the paths that the Lord has set before us… we’ll get tired. We’ll get frustrated. We’ll grow weary. If it were not so, Paul would not have warned us at least three times in the Scriptures to remember that our labor is not in vain -
There would be no need to be warned to remember if we weren’t so prone to forget.
All women grow weary -in every sphere of society, whether we spend our days shaking hands with diplomats or scrubbing floors, whether we get to talk to famous TV show hosts or try to decipher the slurs of a toddler… the fact that we grow weary while following the Lord’s will for our lives at home is not indicative of the fact that we’ve made the wrong choice, or are not living our dreams… it’s indicative of the fact that we’re human, and need to walk whatever paths that lie before us in Christ’s strength, and not our own:
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong. ~2 Corinthians 12:9-10
Give-away
Almost a year ago, I began the journey of writing my first book, Joyfully at Home with the understanding that stay-at-home daughters do get weary. One of my aims was not to tell them to swallow back their need for encouragement, but to remind them that their labors were not in vain, and to rediscover the joy in the choice of a homeward calling.
As I have said before, I truly hope it will be a blessing an encouragement for those who read it. I am glad the Lord gave me the grace to write it, and hope I accomplished my goal in penning it: to present gospel-centric encouragement for daughters.
I am very honored to be able to give away a free copy of Joyfully at Home here at Raising Homemakers.
To Enter: (Please leave a separate comment for each thing you do.)
- Comment on this post . . . and (optional) answer the question:
“When it comes to serving at home, what are the areas where you need the most encouragement?”
- Facebook, Comment, Tweet, Email, Post the link to this giveaway.
By Jasmine, All She Has to Say
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This book would be a joy for both myself and my two daughters. I am a single parent and need encouragement to be the spiritual leader for my family.
I have two daughters (13 and 7) who I would love to have this book for. I think you must be such a blessing to God, your parents and your siblings. I am so glad I found this site. This was just what I needed to read today. Thank you
I need encouragement in letting tasks go while the kids are awake so I can just enjoy them, play with them, laugh with them, smile with them. Often I do tasks while they are not napping so I can nap when they nap. I posted this to Facebook.
This is a very good article. It does get very tiring (even before I became a stay-at-home mom) trying to get everything done. I have come a long way since I started being at home with my daughter. At first I wanted everything perfect, the Stepford Wives syndrome. But now after a year and a half, I have the flow pretty well. I take a nap when my daughter does on days that I get overwhelmed. I do all the chores along in the day instead of trying to get them all done at once. I have a very supportive husband who understands being at home can be trying and listens to me and helps when he can. My most trying thing is my daughter getting upset and I’m not even sure what for. She is a toddler, so it is understandable, but when she gets riled up so do I; I have to work really hard to stay calm and in control while I figure out what is going on with her. With God’s help, I’m getting better at that too.
I also Facebooked your article. I would have anyway because I like to share things like this with the other stay-at-home moms I know, but for the book I’ll mention it here too. It looks like a very good book. We can all use a little encouragement once in a while (or everyday).
While at home I love to sew, especially to enjoy a few of the newer fabrics that are replicas of vintage. So sweet and so much fun to dress up the house. Hardest part is just general up keep of my home. Making sure the plumbing is in good repair, sweeper is working and bag changed etc.
I’m not a homemaker yet; I am only a teenager, training everyday to be a homemaker someday. But I do have first-hand experience babysitting, not only all four of my own younger brothers and sister, but other kids. My number one stress is patience with kids. I have so hard of a time controlling my temper when it comes to a toddler who can’t make up her mind, or a brother who is feeling “manly” trying to assert their “manly independence” with me when I tell them they need to clean their room, or do their schoolwork. So the thing I need the most encouragement in is in being the best authority I can be, when I am in charge. I know what I do and make a habiat now, will become what I do and think when I do, someday become a wife and mother. Good luck to everyone here, and I hope somebody truly needing will get it, and the Lord will bless them through it.
Wow, just found your blog and LOVE this post! I was blessed to have 4 children in under 4 years and my youngest came home from the NICU with a trach. I’m so lucky to be able to stay home with my kids but playing nurse, housekeeper, referee, chef, bookkeeper, etc. on top of wife and mother going on far too little sleep and still not finding time for everything makes me tired, so tired. (Not to complain. Sounds like it, but it wasn’t easy for us to have kids and I love my little family with all my heart and would do anything for them.) I have often felt guilty for feeling so tired and having very little to outwardly show for my feelings of exhaustion.
What I would love the most is the ability to live in the moment. To organize my days and myself in such a way that I’m making the most out of this precious time while my kids are young. I dread the day they are all grown and gone. I dread the day I’m done having babies. And I don’t want to. I want to just enjoy every day with my children.
I’m currently in college, majoring in Elementary Education. This, however, is not my goal in life. It’s more of a plan B. I hope and pray that the Lord will eventually bring a godly man into my life. I would love to be married, have children, and be a full time homemaker. There have been times, though, that I’ve had my doubts as to whether I should continue my education or if I should finish and have that degree in case I ever need it. It’s a matter that can easily depress me, and I’m very glad you have written a book of such encouragement. It’s definitely the type of thing every homemaker–or future homemaker– needs to read.
May God be glorified in all that we do. =)
sometimes I need encouragement that I am using my gifts (at home) as God intended. That, the outside work place isn’t the (only) place for me to use my gifts — that I am exactly where I am intended to be, as a stay at home mom.
I’m in my 30′s and still learning all about homemaking. I also want to pass on my love for homemaking to my daughter. I wish someone had taught me about the value of being a homemaker when I was little, and the glory it gives to God. I pray that I can teach my daughter about this, and would very much like to read through your book with my daughter.
What a great book to put in my daughters hope chest.
I’ve been wanting to read this book! Thanks for doing this giveaway!
All I can say is “WOW”. I am blessed to be connected with a friend smart enough to repost a link to this site. What an immensely talented writer to share not only God’s Word, but to do so with humor, love and intense faith. I would love a copy of your book, and would promote it with your permission on my blog called “Keleia4Him!”. Thank our Lord and Savior for blessing us with you!
I would love a copy of this book for my three daughters, the oldest of which is struggling with the idea staying at home. I would appreciate this encouragement for them.
Michelel
I need encouragement with feeling tired and having problems prioritizing.
Wow! What a generous offer! I’d love to enter the giveaway…
As a stay-at-home daughter, I would like encouragement that I am doing the right thing! Sure my parents are behind me not going to university/getting a secular career, but it’s the other people (often “well-meaning” relatives) who I find so discouraging!
Would love to add this book to my library of mommy/wife books.
I have been reading articles from the LAF website for several years now. I especially enjoy your article because I have 4 daughters ages 8 through 22. My hope is that they will find happiness in marriage and motherhood and fulfilment from traditional womanhood pursuits. I have not always been the best example all their lives as I was just saved 2 years ago and became a stay at home wife and mother to our 5 kids last year. But I am trying to impress upon them how much happier I am now and that it is never too late to make major lifestyle changes. I have been blessed in ways I never expected. I thought my marriage was good before the Lord came into my life, but now our Marriage is better than I could ever imagine. Keep up the good work and may God bless your example to stay-at-home daughters!
My husband & I are in the process of adopting and I am realizing (as the reality of becoming a stay-at-home mom is hitting me straight on) that I do not find JOY in home-making. I wish I could win this book.
I need encouragement in balancing perfection and reality. I love doing things well and when my home is not perfect – I struggle greatly. I love learning shortcuts and simple fixes – they help me maintain a nice home. This post hit me hard because often I am simply too tired to care about my home even though I know I need to – and that’s when guilt comes.
posted the link on facebook
I also need encouragement because my parents are quite sold on me having a strong professional career and even though I have my own family now there’s much tension in the family every time I see them
I want so much to be the wife and mother of Proverbs. But of late it has been so hard. My husband has been out of work for months and I am working in a place I feel depressed and not myself. Please pray for my household. Please pray that my husband stays strong in the L-rd and stays strong in finding work. Something he would love doing. Sorry for the ramble. Thank You, beautiful give away.
This book looks great. I’ve been debating reading it for a while.
Certainly while at home I need the most encouragement to be content in my current situation, to live out the truth that God has called me to this precious time and I should live it to His glory.
This requires not constantly looking to the past or future for contentment but to learn to find joy in all current circumstances (some incredibly challenging).
InHim,
Lisa
I need to be more on top of house work. I feel like I do the same 4-5 things everyday that will make the house seem to be relatively clean, do the dishes, sweep the floor, toss in some laundry so the dirties are out of sight.
I need to learn so much. I need to learn submission and to *want* to keep the house clean. It’s a blessing for my family, and I can say that but I do not fully believe it. I am new to all of this. I’m not a new Christian… per say. But I’m a newly devoted Christian. I’m new to reading the bible and living it. I’m new to all of this and I think your book would be a great first read for me. I am not at home yet. I work 40 hours a week to get out of the debt my husband and I brought upon ourselves. But the end is in sight. Next year I will be preparing to come home to where I belong and so want to be.
Hello! Your post is certainly something I can relate to! I am currently finishing high school and have decided to spend the next years of my life at home doing some of the things you touched on. I plan to continue in my home education, prepare for my home and future husband, and learn to be a true helper and blessing to my family. I know it will not be easy to do that kind of work full time, but I honestly believe my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, has called me to it. Discouragement is a real battle and I am grateful for your encouraging post. May God bless you as you follow Him.
Looks like a wonderful book for my three almost grown daughters!
Thank you Jasmine! I’ve always suspected that our inability to be honest about how tired we get is somehow tied to the world-projected fallacy that we need to somehow justify the choice to be homemakers instead of career conquerors in “a man’s world”.
The area I usually need encouragement is as far as homemaking goes is doing a job well – doing it thoroughly. Even though I am very grown up and should know better, it is way too easy to justify slips here and there as well as short-cuts with the excuse that its my mum’s house and my job is to “help” her – not to do her job. Ouch! Doesn’t say much for my willingness to really help, does it.
Fortunately God is still training my heart – He hasn’t given up on me yet.
I need encouragement to “press on” with my five children, ages 8, 6, 5, 4, and 2. I find that because I’m with my children all day every day, I can get frustrated with the constant need for me to either instruct, correct, or discipline. (I also appreciate when I hear people say I’m doing a good job. Maybe I shouldn’t need that, but it sure helps.) Sometimes I get so caught up in training and correction that I don’t take time to step back and admire the work that God is doing in their lives. When I take time to do that, it usually encourages me to “press on” because God is producing fruit from my labors which I can actually observe – even if they are “little” steps.
What an exciting giveaway!!! My sisters and I followed Jasmine’s blog and were quite sad when she decided to quit blogging. I received and email telling about this giveaway and as I was logging out I was thinking, “Hmmm, the title of that book sounds familiar. . . .” I didn’t realize why until my sister told me about it again tonight.
My biggest struggle is actually working up the motivation to actually get up and do something, once I’m doing something I’m fine, it is getting there that is the hard part.
Please enter me in this giveaway, I would love a copy of this book. And thank you for offering the chance for such a neat book!
I emailed some friends about it:)
I hope my daughters have as much wisdom when they are in college. I’d love to have a copy of this book!
Nice post. I get so caught up in the details of keeping house that I don’t take the time to step back and cherish my little ones. This is definitely an area that I need encouragement in.
I would love to have a copy of this to read with my five daughters. You have a wisdom that is unusual in the young.
I just shared about this on facebook.
Dear Jasmine,
. I just want to try to tell you how greatful we are, your humor and honesty and the truth of the scripture refreshes and encourges and challenges (even this 43yo!). I praise God for your family. Your fathers ministry has blessed my husband incredibly (and all the rest of us). I know that there disciplship of you is this fruit you are bearing. Praise God. I am so very thankful Jasmine for your courage and love of the Lord Jesus to stand firm and be such a gift and blessing. May the Lord Bless you and Keep you.
Thank you so much for this post and for writing *Joyfully at Home*. I am reading this aloud to my girls 18 & 14. We are lovin it!!!! For us it is water in a very dry land, and we were VERY thirsty
I’m the oldest of 6, and love doing things around the house. For the last three years, have been working through undiagnosed auto-immune issues. I’m improved considerably now, but I think if there had been some way for someone to tell me, and me to believe it, I would have liked to know that it’s okay, even proper, to pull back when you can’t do something, that limits are not a curse, that when God says ‘love others as you love yourself’ He doesn’t mean ‘don’t love yourself, and then you don’t have to love others’, and that eventually, I would have the satisfaction of accomplishment again.
I had it “easy” growing up, watching my mother do everything–clean toilets, sew clothes, vacuum, and bake pies–watching but never helping. I never had to lift a finger. I didn’t even have to clean my room! When I was a newlywed almost twelve years ago, I quickly had to learn those skills on the fly, recalling from memory how Mom always did it. Thankfully she was always just a phone call away whenever I had a question on how to roast a turkey or tackle tough laundry stains!
Needless to say, looking backwards I now see what a blessing I could have been to my mom had I helped her out more. What a harvest I could have reaped in return, practicing skills needed for my future as a wife, mother, and manager of a household by actually DOING them alongside an experienced pro. Sadly, I had followed the path of feminism that the world, and my parents desired for me.
But God is merciful and is our redeemer. Now, as the mother of six (so far), I am blessed by studying what godly motherhood and daughterhood looks like. It is my prayer that daily I can humbly lead my daughters down a different path: the path of the wise virgins who followed the Lord and edifyed their faith while they were yet virgins. Books like yours, Jasmine, are both a blessing and store of encouragement for all the King’s daughters…even old married ones!
Thank you for this article! It’s very encouraging. I sometimes feel like I’ve chosen the wrong path because I am not deemed very successful in the worlds’ eyes, but I am empowered when I remind myself that I am following God’s will for my life, and it truly is a joy!
Courtney, I just found your page, and I’m very interested in your encouraging words. I would love a copy of this book. I have a baby daughter right now, and a pre-school son. I also take care of the youth at church, and I am a 6th grade teacher at a Christian school. I am also a pre-school teacher for my son’s Christian Coop preschool. You asked where I need encouragement serving. I guess to be honest, I need encouragement serving when I feel like although I’ve been asked to do something, there’s so many other things on my plate that I feel I should do first. But I feel that if God has given me something else to do, I should take that portion with Thanksgiving instead of resentment. I need encouragment for finding a balance and a joyful heart in taking care of what God gives me.
Excellent article, and just what I needed to read this morning! Jasmine, it was a pleasure to meet you at the Covenant Care banquet a few months ago….I had no idea when I met you that Covenant Care would place twins in our arms a few weeks later! I appreciate the encouragment you have given today!
How is that someone so much younger than I can provide biblical encouragement to me? The stomach flu has been slowly working its way through our family. At night. The baby is an early bird. I’m tired yet will not admit it to anyone! Not even after I listen to moms who work outside the home list all the things that are making them exhausted. Thank you once again for well spoken words at just the right time.
I have wanted this book ever since it came out. It looks like such an encouraging and challenging tool for any young ladies Christian Walk. Thanks for the opportunity to win a copy! (entry #1)
I emailed about this giveaway! (entry #2)
-Jessica P.
I facebooked about this giveaway! Thanks for another chance at winning such a great book! (entry #3)
-Jessica P.
I posted about this giveaway and linked to it! (entry #4)
http://jessica-literarypursuits.blogspot.com/2011/03/giveaway.html
-Jessica P.
I’d love to win this book!
I loved reading your article about fatique. I too am a stay at home mother of three kids and love my role in life as such. As we are bombarded with media visions of “power” women it is easy to feel less then deserving of being tired after a day of homemaking then say pulling in a 6 figure salary. Let us all remember that even the so called “career” women were more then likely raised by a stay at home parent.
Blessings all.
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