Do you feel frustrated with your homemaking skills? I do! And then I think, how will I ever pass this on to my daughter if I don’t get this myself? I especially feel frustrated on days when I decide to have a down day. If I spend one day just letting things go – the place suddenly appears as though a bomb went off – the dishes quickly pile in the sink, the shoes pile by the door, the coats pile on the chair, the clothes pile in the bathroom, the markers, crayons, paper and toys just pile pile pile!!!!
Homemaking takes diligence and we must embrace it if we will find joy in it! As we clean we long for perfection – to create a heavenly home that truly does not exist – there will be no perfect home until we reach the shores of heaven. The frustration we feel as homemakers is a direct result of the effects of a fallen world.
Have you ever noticed how every time you go to the grocery store there is a new expensive cleaning gadget that has been created to make cleaning quicker? We have gone from rags and soap to throw away wipes that already have the solution in them. We have gone from buckets of soapy water and mops to thingymajigs that spray liquid and mop. It’s really amazing how they market these “quick” cleaning items! We want the easy way out!
But truly to be a good homemaker it takes just one thing – DILIGENCE! It’s not the tool in your hand – it’s your heart! You can read all the websites and magazines and books on cleaning and own every gadget and gizmo – but if you lack diligence and have not given homemaking your time – you just won’t get it all done. And this is what our daughters need to know!
The Proverbs 31 lady gave time to her home. We canbe busy running here and there – going to play dates, sports for the kids, birthday parties and serving at church. Those are not bad things – BUT Titus 2:5 says that the younger women in the church need to learn to be “busy at home“. So that means – first we need time in our homes and second, if we feel really busy homemaking – then you are doing it right!!
Homemaking takes time and will keep you quite busy! The home is where the molding of children’s hearts takes place. The home is where your husband finds comfort and solace, where your children can share their passions and grow intellectually, spiritually and emotionally. Because we live in a fallen world – your home will never be perfect. Please do not strive for perfection – you will frustrate yourself and all who live in your home. But on the opposing side, please do not neglect your home believing that there is something greater and with more meaning outside the doors of your home.
God clearly puts a priority on homemaking in both Titus 2 and in the example of the Proverbs 31 woman. So embrace homemaking today – and get busy. Sit down and make your to-do list and follow the mandate that God has given younger women – “be busy at home“. And don’t forget to bring your daughters along side of you as you are busy at home.
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love, love, love this post. there is so much truth here, truth that has convicted me, challenged and come around and around again and again as I rise and fall on this journey of dilligence. thanks so much for the encouragement!
Thank you for this great post. It is so true, attitude is everything. Providing a neat, warm, inviting home for our family is rewarding and we certainly don’t need any fancy cleaning gadgets.
A bucket, vinegar, a scrub brush and some rags is all.
Warm wishes, Tonya
Oh what a wonderful and truthful post! My life seems to be pile after pile at the moment- we are travelling backwards and forwards a lot for medical reasons and the piles in the house are comPILED with everything that goes to and from! I needed to be reminded that being busy in the home is RIGHT and I sure feel busy at the moment! Thank you for helping me to put it in the right perspective.
Thank you Courtney!!!!!!! I have a 10yo daughter and we are working together to become the best homemakers that we can be. I have fallen prey many times to the “time-saving” cleaning products, and they always let me down in terms of their thoroughness.
I am giving serious though to returning to simpler cleaning methods that I can afford and use them consistently.
Barbaranne
I am thankful for this Raising Homemaker’s site! It has helped me to see value in what I do. It has also motivated me and reset my thinking in some areas!
Thanks!
& I enjoyed reading this post as well.
Leanne
Thank you! LOVE THIS SITE SO FAR…exactly what I was looking for!
Thank you for the encouragement today.
Being pregnant and on the verge of giving birth I hear so often, “take it easy! The house’ll be there later.” While I know intentions are good, I simply cannot sit around and abide my house turning into chaos and filth, especially bringing a new baby into the picture.
How can I expect to teach my children how nice it is to live in a clean, tidy house when I let things go? Sure, we do have seasons of letting things slide, but we should not let things go. And, if we spend diligent time during our wellness keeping up our homes AND training our children to pick up after themselves, it won’t be so bad when we do have our down days.
I know what you mean! People would tell me that all the time, and while there is truth to that, it’s not like pregnant ladies are incapable of doing ANYTHING!! I had to rest my swollen ankles the last few weeks before my daughter came, but I would clean in spurts and I learned how to be more efficient and focused. It was actually a little irritating when people would tell me that because I WAS taking the time to rest, but I wasn’t going to spend all day in the recliner either!
I love this post! It is so true! I often find myself praying for diligence when I’m feeling less than motivated.
Hallee
I smiled as I read this. I look up from the computer screen and look around the room at total chaos. Even the rooms that I had in “perfect” order yesterday are now needing more than a quick pick up. With 4 kids 6 and under just life is hard to keep up with, forget taking a day off and letting things go like the writer mentions. I was just telling my hubby the other day that I feel overwhelmed by the pressure to be super mom and wife. I am my 3 son’s example of what a wife should be and my daughters example of being a wife and mother. PHEW!!! I have to take time each day to remind myself that my children will see my efforts, that right now they need my time more then a dusted house……and now I just realised that I can teach the lesson of diligence through my doing the chores over and over. Thanks
I so needed to read this. I started making cards for my SHE (Sidetracked Home Executives) box, but I got so overwhelmed with the amount of work there is to keeping a home that I just put it away and thought, “Forget it!” I know I need to do more than just crisis clean! : ) I don’t have a daughter, but I know my son will need SOME homemaking skills. I have to be the example for him, too. Thank you for the reminder.
I appreciate the post today regarding the piles, new-fangled cleaning helps and especially the condition of my ATTITUDE in keeping a tidy,peaceful home. Always good to be reminded of keeping my heart condition right!
In an effort to make things easier, when my children started to help clean the floors, I invested in some of these new cleaning products. I’ve been buying them without paying attention to cost. I was just at the store the other day, had a coupon, and was about to purchase some of these supplies. While calculating my savings, I realized that (even with the coupon)what I would pay for these supplies is what I would pay for five dinner’s worth of meat!! I apprecaite the convenience, but am going to be more frugal with my cleaning expenses from now on.
Also, looking forward to seeing the Daughter’s Returning DVD. Recently had a conversation with someone who was very curious as to what my 14yod will do after being homeschooled…What are her options? What will she DO with her life? It was encouraging to me as I answered that her future is in God’s hands, my husband and I in no way will rush her toward a career/schooling decision and it’s her desire to stay under the covering of our roof until she marries. There are plenty of things to keep us ALL busy in our home, but if she finds something she’d like to do for work, we’ll help her pursue that as well. Thanks for the head’s up on the DVD.
Thank you for the encouragement to keep going! So many times I feel like I’m just running in circles and usually I am but it’s important what I do and what my daughters learn. Hey and don’t knock a good Clorox wipe
Thank you for the reminder of diligence. Not to seek perfection. I have been seeking perfection instead of diligence. This post really hit home and I thank you and the Lord for a reminder of what I need to do in my homemaking struggles.
Yes…diligence! A good reminder when you feel like you are doing the same things over and over. You just finished the laundry and the hamper is overflowing again. You just vacuumed and there are crumbs on the floor. The toys were all neatly organized and now they were all taken out again to be played with. I will remind myself…be diligent. Thanks for the encouraging post.
Hit the nail of the head!!! That is ALL TRUTH. Do the action and your heart will follow. I use cleaning as a time to count my blessings–Thanking God that I have dishes to clean because we have food to eat, clothes to wash because my children and husband are healthy, etc.
I am so glad I stumbled across this blog! I found it late last night and couldnt wait to get a good look at it this morning. I’m lovin’ it!!! Thanks for the encouragement!
Great post! I just started a Home Management Binder and one section has my Daily, Weekly and Monthly chores. For some reason, having the list out and visible on my kitchen counter helps me to get it all done throughout the day.
Thank you for this reminder! Just what I needed today.
This was a great post. I am 4 weeks postpartum and we’ve been spending parts of our day simply decluttering and preparing for the coming school year. I experience the frustration of teaching my 2 older daughters how to be homemakers when I am so bad at it. I am learning the lessons that were written in this post. I also loved what you said about the cleaning supplies. I have never had the money to buy all the different gadgets, although I wanted to at time. I have finally settled on a few great cleaning supplies. Most of these are homemade except one that concentrated cleaner that I invest in. Nothing will ever take the place of good old fashion elbow grease (which is the ONE thing I did learn from my mom regarding homemaking.
I am thankful for that because it is something I am teaching my children well. I am loving this website.
Love this post, and love Jessica N’s response. We can be diligent and do and do and do, but it’s not going to be that enjoyable. If we involve God, and let Him guide us through our work each day not only will we get it done (probably a lot easier), but we’ll enjoy it too.
I think when it comes to housework, God is like a fancy new cleaning product you can’t wait to try. Makes things easier and a lot more fun.
Sometimes I think, “I’ll be so much happier lying on the couch reading books today and ignoring the housework.” But if I just push through the laziness and tidy up, even for only 30 or 45 minutes, I can relax so much better afterward.
Even though I do not have children yet, I am trying to learn everything I can from you godly mothers! Thank you for this article. It’s so encouraging to see other women who are also striving to glorify God in everything they do, including cleaning their home. We are called to be busy at home and not eat from the bread of idleness and this is no easy thing, it is something we have to decide to do each moment of each day!
http://www.dontwasteyourhomemaking.com
Thank you
Great post Courtney. Sometimes I lack joy in keeping my home (anyone else feel like all they do is pick up the same stuff over and over again?). I have to remind myself that God gave me an amazing opportunity to be at home with my children and create a beautiful and safe home for them to live in.
I am 59 years old, with two adult children (one still under our roof) and I still struggle with diligence. When I was growing up, I was one of seven children. My focus was on avoiding “work” and reading instead. So, while I knew “how” to clean and cook, I never developed the self-discipline needed to be a keeper of my home. I was already married when I became a Christian and began to realize the full effect of my system of avoidance. I had developed the ability to look at my home without seeing the clutter (until company was coming) and when I did clean it was mostly crisis cleaning which wore me out to where I didn’t want to clean again. So I began to retrain myself at the same time I was training my children, feeling like I was having to learn along with them. I still have a ways to go, but have come a long ways from where I was. Thanks for the encouragement in this article. I would still rather do projects with a beginning and end, than housework, but am learning to embrace my ministry at home more.
Wow! That is just exactly like me, and exactly what I’m struggling with; re-training myself and practicing diligence in caring for our home.
This hit home for me big time. I wrote in my prayer journal last night how out of sorts I have been feeling. Always feeling like I’m not getting it,getting upset with myself and my kids because the house is yet again a mess. Thank you for this post.
I just read a post about feeling defeated because of our huge lists, but it is like “How do you eat an elephant?” One bite at a time! We just have to keep going and asking God for good attitudes in the place where He has called us – our home.
Such a good word! “It’s not the tool in your hand – it’s the state of your heart”. This is SO true.
…a lesson I need to learn and re-learn constantly.
Thank you and every blessing,
Anne (in Scotland) x
ok, now that I’ve been convicted, Im logging off the computer to bless my house – thanks! (great-big-smile and a wink)
WONDERFUL post!! Thank you for these wise words of conviction and encouragement!
Now to not let the feeling of “summer break” coax us into putting off “work” longer.
First day of summer, I’m looking forward to getting busy and getting things done around the farm AND keeping the house clean. Her summer break means I get a break with carrying the whole load.
Great post!
Excellent post and timely too as this morning I decided to clean house! Thank you for this perspective!
Oh how I need encouragement! I so want to be a great Godly homemaker, but I feel I fall so short. I homeschool and we sometimes get so behind on the house. Like you said, then things are piled everywhere and I’m wondering where did all this come from. How do you all deal with illness(I have a bad thyroid that makes me really drained and also my Dr. put me on heart meds to slow my heart down and that makes me drag) When I feel so bad physically it’s so hard to get motivated to get up and at it. Thanks so much for the encouraging words. God Bless
I used to be so busy outside of our home…doing “good” things as a missionary. I was constantly falling short at home and my home was suffering and the people I loved most were too.
I am now busy at home and I finally love it. It took a over a year of me fighting my SELFish SELF to let go and embrace my role as a homeschooler, SAHM, homemaker.
We rarely run around and are all so much more peaceful because of that!
thanks for this post – i needed to “hear” it! you know, my mother-in-law sent toys for my 2 1/2 year old a while back – a toy vacuum cleaner, broom, and dust pan. at the time, i thought they were really stupid toys, but the other day, i REALLY needed to get some cleaning done, but my daughter just wasn’t letting it happen. i decided that was a good time to break out those toys. and you know what? she loved cleaning with her mama! so i was able to turn a chore into a fun bonding time with my daughter.
Thanks for this post. Sometimes it is easy to let things slide. I generally try to not do household chores on Sunday so Mondays are crazy with all the catch up work. I know I can feel the Spirit in my home more effectively when it is clean and orderly. I have a 2 year old daughter and she loves to help momma. We often sing while we clean and it makes the time so much more pleasant.
Yes!
This was just the encouragement I needed to make homemaking one of my top priorities….not like I have many others. But because it takes so much, I must embrace the beauty, and pray for the diligence to be the best homemaker I know. Not perfect, just a model of excellence to my husband and children.
Because of Him,
Pamela
This was perfect! I spent most of my day yesterday trying to work up the ambition to clean house, I’t took me twice as long to do a simple task, my heart just wasn’t in it. I needed to hear this post. Thanks.
Thank you for the reminder and I was encouraged!
As my husband and I dig into the Word of God, our expectations of what our childrens lives are going to look like have changed (drastically) so this DVD would be a great tool as we raise up our children in the way they should go! Many blessings!!
that is so true–i do have a lot of cleaning gadgets, sprays and what-not, even just to make things easier for the children to do their jobs..but alas, it seems that it doesn’t, it is where their heart it (and mine!!) that these thingamagigs seem to have undermined my purpose in teaching them the value of being tidy, neat and not DREADING chores…I’m glad i found your blog. May the Lord bless you as you seek to honor Him
Thank you for this great reminder!
Great Post!!! Love the Blog!
This was such a timely post. I have been feeling so frustrated and inadequate with my homemaking skills. And getting annoyed with my little girl instead of teaching her. Thank you so much for the encouraging reminder.
Thank you for this encouragement! I do not have a daughter (yet!), but as a young mom of a 2 year old boy with another blessing on the way, I’ve been so blessed by this website so far. And, as a missionary wife in a developing country, I often find homemaking a challenging, time-consuming work, but one I know that I’m called to to bless our family and to help my husband in his ministry. The Titus 2 instruction for young women to be “busy at home” has been an encouragement to me knowing that this is where my main role/place is (even if I am a missionary)… and today as I read this article, I really appreciated this reminder:
“second, if we feel really busy homemaking – then you are doing it right!!”
I have been struggling with feeling guilty that taking care of our home takes so much of my time (so that I don’t spend a lot of time in outside ministry), so it was good to be reminded that at this stage in life, I SHOULD be busy at homemaking. Thank you!
a little p.s.
I also liked what you wrote about cleaning and housekeeping gadgets… getting back to the basics with not much more than a mop and a bucket here have helped me learn a lot about keeping a home! =)
Boy, this post was meant for me. I stuggle so badly with being diligent. I want my daughter to know how to keep home with a joyful attitude. How can she, when I moan about cleaning that I have let slide?! Very encouraging post, thank you!
Very well written and such an encouragement! Wish I had this when my six were little and about my feet! I did enjoy being a stay at home mom, but my attitude about the forever cleaning job was not so good….this puts it into perspective very nicely. We are honoring God in being busy at home!
I loved this post! I desire so much to be diligent with my homemaking, but it seems my chronic illness keeps me from being able to keep up. I will have two good days where I feel I really have my house in order, but then will be so sick for the next few days from doing too much that all my work falls apart. Any suggestions? I have two little ones too under 4.
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